Asher's song

I few months back I wrote a song for Asher. I didn't think very hard about it, it just waltzed into my head. (Literally... it is in 3/4 time.) It is a little lullaby, and it can't be his song forever, but I enjoy singing it to him for now. I just put him to bed with it, and he smiled himself to sleep. Ahhh, these are the moments.

I'm a little shy about this because I write songs all the time, some of which I like a lot, and I don't want the way I feel about my songs to be tainted by people's opinions. Luckily, this blog has about three readers and I think I can handle the heat from them. I wish I could put the music on the blog too, because it really isn't great poetry. The melody kind of saves it. Anyway, here goes. 

Kisses on Kisses

Kisses on kisses on kisses 

If I could have all of my wishes 

With that light in your eyes  

Could it be a surprise 

I want kisses on kisses on kisses  

I'll love you forever and ever 

Each moment together is treasure 

You love me I love you 

What else is there to do 

But give kisses on kisses forever  

Your lips are perfect 

So please don't refuse 'em 

If you let me  

I'll show you how to use 'em with  

Kisses on kisses on kisses 

How naturally beautiful this is 

When you laugh, when you smile 

It makes me want to pile on the  

Kisses on kisses on kisses on kisses on kisses on kisses on kisses

Principle

About 2 minutes ago I was wasting precious moments of my life looking at 66 pages of shoes at Amazon.com. You might think it is sad or lame that I look at clothes, shoes, and accessories online, but I don't really care. It is just something I do every once in a while. Get over it. I like to look at cute wearables. I'm not apologizing for that.

While I was looking at all those shoes I was commentating in my head. Those are really high, I wouldn't be able to walk in them. This pair is crazy, I would never spend that much money on shoes that would make me self-conscious. I bet those are uncomfortable. Wow, those are really cute! 

Now whenever I saw a cute pair of shoes, I would look at the price and the designer. Designer. I should use that term loosely, because I'm fairly certain that some of these people did not design the shoes which bore their name. Examples: Jessica Simpson and Paris Hilton. Every time I liked a pair of shoes that was "designed" by either of these girls, I cringed. I also immediately tried to change my mind. You see, I do not want to like anything that touches these people. I do not want to contribute to the funds of either of these young women. I do not think they are good examples to society and I do not want to enable their bad behavior by giving them any of my money. I know that my refusal to buy their shoes is not going to send either of these girls to the poor house, but I'm voting with my money. I don't care if Britney Spears' perfume will make everyone who ever smells me think I am the smartest, most talented and enchanting person they have ever met... I will not buy her perfume. Does this make me crazy? (I just can't sleep... I'm so excited, I'm in too deep.... oh oh oh crazy....)

I don't know, what do you think?

'Tis the Season?

My facewash smells like eggnog.

(How's this one, Tracy?)

T.P. 2

Our current role of toilet paper was perforated half way through the role, and then it just quit. No more helpful tear lines, just one long sheet. I guess I bought a bum package. (Pun intended.) 

Only YOU Can Donate Your Own Blood

Dan signed up to give blood at 6:00pm tonight, but he got home around 5:45 and said he wasn't feeling up to it. He was going to call and cancel, but I volunteered to go in his stead. I used to give blood as often as humanly possible before I got pregnant, and I haven't been since. I shoved something in my mouth (for dinner) and hopped out the door. Here are some highlights from my experience:

-As I parked the car I saw a portly gentleman with a white shirt, white socks, black shorts, and suspenders walking by my car. There's something you don't see every day. He went into the blood bank just before me. 

-They added a new question. "Have you ever been pregnant? How many times?" That was a lot more fun to answer than some of those other crazy and explicit questions.

-I just made the iron level of 38%. They had to spin my blood, which has never happened before.

-I was FAST! I think I was done in 4 minutes. 

-Three different nurses told me how much they liked my shoes within those 4 minutes.

-The man across from me looked like he was getting a facial or a massage or something. He had a look of complete relaxation and euphoria on his face the whole time blood was draining out of his body. Also, the bottoms of his shoes were very clean looking.

-The platelet people were watching a movie with Keri Russel in it. Every time I looked over at the screen, someone was violently kissing someone else. It looked pretty cheesy.

-After I was done I went to the "canteen" area. And yes, that is really what they call it. There was a woman at least 15 years older than me, a man in his 40s and another guy about my age. We were joking about all kinds of stuff and having a great time talking. That is the one and only time I have ever had an actual pleasant conversation with anyone at a blood donor "canteen" area. It was totally weird. 

-I think if I fill out a card and drop it off at some dealership in Goleta I could win a new car. Maybe it is just a car wash? I'd better double check on that. Oh, we blood donors get all the good stuff.

-As I was exiting the "canteen" area I saw my suspender-wearing friend being led to a station. He was in the building before me and it took him that long to get to a chair? How slowly was he answering his questions? (Umm... I mean.... look how fast this can go when you make an appointment!)    

Make the Switch

Tonight we went to the AT&T store to become AT&T cell costumers slightly before our Verison contract ends. My husband's phone is stuck in "car mode" or something so he can't accept phone calls or get his messages. He also just really wants an iphone.

An hour after stepping foot in the store (with our young, tired, restless child I might add) we walked out with new phone numbers and new phones (and new levels of physical tiredness I did not know I could achieve). I did not get an iphone because I don't care what I use to make and receive phone calls as long as it works. Dan is a happy man. He will probably be playing with his new toy for a few hours. 

Side note: We had a very friendly guy by the name of Andrew helping us out tonight. He has a French girlfriend, a one bedroom apartment where he cannot receive mail and a 3 month old son named Elliot. Anyone want to stalk him? He's almost begging for it giving out that much personal information.

Another side note: I saw a guy in the store that used to like me in High School. I think his name was Eric, I don't remember how I got to know him, he was a year younger than me, we never had a class together and he was in the ROTC. He used to give me very long and posessive hugs in the hallways and I had a slight inkling that he may have been lightly stalking me back in the day. Thankfully he was with his girlfriend and although he kept looking at me (and my son and my husband) he never said anything to me. I was kind of uncomfortable, since we were both in the same small store for an HOUR. 

Last side note, I promise: WHY is it a law of the universe that whenever you see someone that you used to know but haven't seen in a long time you are either a) not wearing makeup, b)shabbily dressed, c)unshowered, d)looking fat or e)all of the above? I looked better earlier today, I swear.

Patience is a Virtue

Today I put Asher down for a nap. I had just been jogging, and I usually take a shower while he is napping. I was a little more tired than usual, so I waited to hop in the shower. After about fifteen minutes Asher started crying a little bit. Sometimes he gets his foot caught in the crib slats or something, so I thought I would just check on him, but I wanted to make sure he wasn't just crying himself to sleep, so I waited about 5 minutes more. His calling/crying got a little more insistent, so I opened the door. I almost vomited.

Somehow he had taken off half of his diaper. He had pooped, and you know what is coming next. The crib was covered in poop. It was all over him, the sheets, the bumper... miraculously it missed his stuffed animal which I promptly removed. He was happy to see me, but I couldn't touch him for a few minutes. I was in shock, but I started acting anyway. I got baby wipes and removed as much of the offending matter as I could, but it was stubborn stuff. Eventually I stripped him down, plopped him in the tub and started scrubbing him and rinsing him off. He cried at the water coming out of the faucet, but I didn't care. I just kept trying not to inhale. He wanted to touch me, but I dodged the best I could. Even after he was clean I didn't want to kiss him. I don't want to think about what has been in his mouth.

I finished scrubbing him and I dried him off and got him dressed. Then I let him play while I was cleaning up the crib with about 20 disposable lysol cleaning sheets. Of course, while I was cleaning he found my brand new necklace from my trip to LA and broke it. I usually don't care about that sort of thing, and it was only a dollar, but I hadn't worn it yet and it is really cute and he had just POOPED all over everything... so I was a little rough as I immediately wrapped him up in a clean blanket and put him down in his newly cleaned crib for a delayed nap. He cried for a little while, but he's asleep now- which is a good thing... my nerves are shot! How do people deal with this stuff!? It is only 12:00, and I feel done for the day.

Maybe Asher was just trying to help me with my diet. I feel like I can never eat again.